Day 149: Thanksgiving

I declined all invites for turkey dinner today and spent the day doing whatever I felt like doing. I went to visit Mark at the cemetery this morning, tell him how thankful I am that we met, loved, married, and made the most of every moment. I miss him so very much, but today it didn’t debilitate me. I worked in the garden and on the lawn, and made myself a big unique dinner (with lots of veggies that he wouldn’t like). With the added bonus of movie marathons and football on tv, it’s been a nice way to spend the day. …and I got to wear another one of the new shirts that he ‘bought’ for me yesterday. 🙂

Thankfully we didn’t make a big deal over thanksgiving. I think it was a good ‘tester holiday’ before the ones we actually celebrated happen (which is essentially every one except this one). It also helps give me security that I can tell everyone no and keep holidays in my own way. (Ooh I feel like Scrooge in saying that, but it’s true – let me keep it in my own way, and everyone else can keep it in theirs… When I’m ready to celebrate something again and so choose, I will.) No one has been pushy, and I am glad for that.

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